Don’t Propose on the First Date

I’ve been married to my wife for almost 13 years now. Pretty normal courtship – you know, the regular dinner dates and trips to the movies. We loved spending time together and spent hours on the phone late into the night getting to know each other. But there was one thing a little out of the ordinary about the beginning of our love story. I started shopping for an engagement ring less than three months into our relationship and proposed right before our first Christmas together – 6 months to the day after we started dating. I had seen enough. I was smitten, I was sure, and I was ready to lock this one up.

Some people (namely, her father) thought this was a little too quick. However, I’ve always had a pretty strong talent for sales and persuasion so after being grilled intensely about my future plans, I won his approval. All was set, and I couldn’t be more excited. But suddenly an overwhelming fear came over me that sent my nerves into overdrive and almost dissuaded me altogether. I knew I wanted her, but had she seen enough to convince her to choose me? Did she have enough time to really get to know me? Would she have doubts that made her say no? Was it too soon to ask?

Many of you have heard me talk about my other job in youth ministry from time to time. Watching young relationships makes me praise God I’m married and hopefully shouldn’t have to worry about the dating scene ever again. Those teenagers fall in and out of love about as often as they change their clothes, and their social media world is catered to building shallow, flippant relationships. People can project just about any identity they want through edited photos and false information, so you might never get to know who a person really is until after you’ve invested a LOT of time. Wisdom and common sense tell us to take the important decisions in life slowly with thought and consideration. But our society is telling us HURRY UP, ACT NOW, and DON’T MISS OUT! This puts the person who has a decision to make in a very pressured, unsure, and uncomfortable place.

I was listening to a marketing podcast the other day where the host was addressing how businesses rush into asking their prospects for a commitment, and normally that’s a sales death sentence. “That’s like asking them to marry you on the first date!” he said. I want you to ask yourself something here. How quickly in the relationship are you asking for prospects to commit their business to you? Are you building a relationship at all before asking them to act? And are you asking for too much too soon? If so, you’re probably setting yourself up for heartbreak.

One of the most solid and timeless truths in marketing is, People buy from people they trust. But far too often contractors are in such desperate need of new leads or want to push into new areas that they try to kick in the door and expect a warm welcome. This is a huge cause of discouragement too, when you invest in a mailing or other new marketing push to a cold list and are met with nothing but crickets. What went wrong? You proposed on the first date.

Remember, ongoing relationships with your existing customer base and the perceived relationship you have with your entire service area through reputation and branding are what keep you in business. That’s what good marketing does. Every message you send to a former customer that gives them valuable information and advice builds the relationship. But if every time they hear from you you’re asking for a sale, the relationship soon becomes viewed as one-sided and will soon be cut off. Good marketing also builds secondhand trust even before a prospect does business with you. Google reviews, established top of mind ads like billboards, and professional branding help show you to be established and credited even before they use you themselves. But if they haven’t seen your logo around enough or haven’t heard others talking about you, and you come out of nowhere to ask for a major sale… you probably won’t like the answer. Groundwork must be done first.

• Ask to hold hands before hitting your knee – This goes back to knowing your audience and developing a good message to market match, which is a key to good response. If you’re trying to move into a new area or get first-time business out of a list, don’t ask for everything right from the start. Sure, we all want the big ticket sales and you might have a killer deal to offer, but start with just getting a foot in the door. Be upfront with your messaging and use your first few touches as introductory, then offer a low risk offer like a simple tune-up or home inspection. Get on site and start the face-to-face relationship, then build from there.

• Fruitful relationships take time – Sometimes it’s hard to see it this way, but those customers in your base that buy from you consistently without haggling about price, or complaining, and are referring friends are a LOT more valuable to you over time than a wave of new change-outs. Focus more on how you can get more long-term customers in your base and less on a quick dollar. But this does take an investment of both money and time.

On average a cold prospect must be contacted between 7 and 12 times before they’ll respond to a sales solicitation. And after they say yes once, you must have some form of effective retention system to keep them engaged with you so that you get their future business. Do it right, giving them time to build up their trust in you, and they’ll commit to you wholeheartedly.

At Hudson,Ink we can help you get the most out of your marketing, and it starts with good advice to keep you from wasting money by asking your prospects for too much too soon. We offer strategy and automated systems for lead generation and customer retention that can help you build lasting and profitable customer relationships. Call (800) 489-9099 or use this link to book a conversation with me and I’ll show you the Hudson,Ink difference.